Hold Me, Wrap Me Up, Whilst I Swing From The Chandelier
by CassidysPersona
Summary: "Be my friend, hold me, wrap me up, unfold me, I am small and needy, warm me up And breathe me." Three people are dealing with grief in their own way, Serena's on a bender, Zosia's and Dom are refusing to go home and now Zosia's got an estranged family member working with her, Dom's just about holding on for dear life to his emotions. Is it all going to prove too much?
1. Chapter One

**A/N: Ok so this is just an idea I've come up with, please let me know if you think I should carry on?**

 **From**

 **Cassidy x**

It had been exactly two months since Arthur had passed away, Dom and Zosia were struggling to move on. The others, though they didn't show it, they were struggling to move on with life. It was at work they needed to be, they needed to act somewhat professional. Zosia was on Darwin staring at the bed Arthur had been on a couple of months ago. The bed she had watched him crash on and when Jac Naylor sent him into theatre she had refused Zosia access to it. Dom was on Keller hoping to have a decent case to distract him and inside Hanssen's office was a new junior doctor.

"Are you sure you're ready to come back?" Hanssen asked the junior doctor who had thick black hair, round ice blue eyes, muscular arms, and an oval shaped face along with a button nose.

"I'm here for a reason Mr Hanssen," as the junior doctor spoke, the accent he had, became more noticeable, "That is to work…I may have took a few years off to look after my dad, but I want to be here, I want to learn…I want to finish what I started."

"We'll start you off on Darwin, you said your speciality is for cardiothoracic," Hanssen stood up and walked slowly towards the door, "Word of advice, Jac Naylor is bald and brilliant but she does have her flaws."

"Don't we all?" the new junior doctor joked but when Hanssen didn't laugh, he ducked his head and kept quiet. Hanssen guided the new junior outside the door and they made their way to Darwin.

Mo was by the front desk at the computer, looking through a patient's notes, "Ms Effanga, this is Dr Markiewicz," Hanssen announced and Mo looked up.

"Nice to meet you," Mo held out her hand for him to shake, Hanssen had strolled away and left them two together, "Jac have you met our new junior?" Mo asked the lead consultant who was looking at an x-ray result on her iPad.

"And why would I do that?" Jac asked with sarcasm in her voice, she didn't even look up at the new doctor. She despised junior doctors especially ones who were daddy's girls and too bubbly, "Mr Lomas's X-Ray has come back, you may want to take a look," Jac handed the iPad to Mo her faced dropped, Jac turned her head to face the new junior, with much restrain to send the new one off her ward she looked up and said, "And you come with me," Jac ordered her new junior. As the pair walked away Valentine and Zosia turned up, Ollie grabbed a pen out of the pot and wrote down some notes.

"Hey Valentine you've got competition," Mo joked to Ollie, "You're not the only one with blue eyes on this ward now."

"Why's that did Jac Naylor find a new toy to play with?" Ollie asked as he dropped the pen he had borrowed back into the pot.

"New Junior Doctor," Mo held both ends of her stethoscope with her hands and Ollie's face looked confused. Zosia however had been the one to speak at this precise moment.

"Since when did we have someone new?" Zosia asked as she walked around the desk and sat on the free seat, she felt quite chuffed to have someone new because that meant, she Zosia March wasn't the only junior on the ward.

"Apparently now, Hanssen dropped him off…can't remember his surname, it sounded German or Polish," Mo left the two young doctors too it and neither said anything to each other.

It was about ten minutes later when the new junior was allowed out of Jac Naylor's office, safe to say he looked a little frazzled, Zosia who had left Ollie to finish with a patient turned around to speak to Jac when she stopped dead in her tracks, she glared her eyes at him and very quickly ducked her head then dashed away, "Zosia…" the junior doctor whispered as Zosia scurried away, he looked at the less than impressed look on Jac's face – why couldn't she have somebody normal on her team for once? He swallowed a lump in his throat, "I'm sorry but I need to…" he ran after her, outside of the ward and down the stairs, "Zosia wait…." He picked up his speed and finally he managed to get in front of her. As he jumped off the second stair to the bottom he stood in front of her, "Zosia," as Zosia moved left he did the same.

"Leave me alone," she went to walk away again but he stopped her, "Ben let me past!" she shouted but he grabbed her arm, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be back home? Ignoring us, not talking to us? Because that's what you've done for the past three years!" she tried to move but he had a strong grip and with no choice Zosia had to look up at him, as her eyes met his she couldn't help but see a resemblance. His eye colour, her eye colour were almost the same, he looked like his dad – kind and warm, it reminded her of her mother, "What are you doing here?" she felt his grip loosen and then she moved away.

"Let me explain…please," Ben begged, he knew he had screwed up. Three years hardly any contact, then suddenly none at all it was no wonder she was angry, "I know it's not an excuse but…dad…he had a breakdown after Auntie Anya died," he saw Zosia's face go from angry to confused, "He couldn't cope Zosia, he went on a bender, drugs and dodgy deals the lot. I had to look after him, I didn't cut myself off on purpose but I didn't want to worry you."

Zosia laughed with disbelief as he told her all this, that was not an excuse to cut contact. It was almost as bad as what her dad had done, only he turned up after a few months. Zosia's cousin had not even contacted her to tell her he was coming here, "You didn't want to worry me?" she placed her hand behind her head and laughed again, "Babcia and Dziadek heard nothing from you, their own son, your father couldn't be bothered to contact them after they lost their daughter."

Ben again walked over to Zosia and put his hands on her shoulders, "Zosh he lost his twin," Ben tried to defend his father as much as he could, though the argument was getting them nowhere, "He just lost it. You do not know what it was like Zosh," Zosia stepped back and walked over to the window.

"Don't you dare talk about not understanding," she clenched her teeth as she said it, "My dad went AWOL for months, he drowned himself in a bottle and basically abandoned me," Zosia folded her arms and walked around in circles, "You think you're the only one in this world who suffered? You decided to cut contact because you couldn't face the fact she died!" Zosia hit him on the chest with anger, "You couldn't face your own family and neither could your dad," as she finished hurting his chest, she stopped by a familiar voice.

"Zoshie?" Guy had heard the shouting from outside the ward, he recognised the voice of his nephew, and then he heard a smacking noise, he rushed as fast as he could to the scene and he was glad he got there on time, "Darling what's going on?" he asked her calmly stepping carefully towards her. He put his hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eyes, "Zoshie?" he saw her eyes go watery.

"Ask him over there," Zosia pushed away from her dad and then made her way back up to the ward. Guy wanted to give her some space, so he turned to face Ben and smiled slightly.

"Shall we grab a coffee?" Guy offered his nephew-in-law he left him no choice when he put his around his shoulder and guided him down the stairs.

When the approached the first floor they made their way to Pulses, it was fairly empty with a few people in there, "Two coffee's please, make one of those extra strong," Guy placed the money on the counter and walked over to the seats, "Sit down," Guy said calmly, "Now…Ben tell me, what was that all about up there?" he wish he had known he was back in England, one he probably could've got him and Zosia together, in a different scenario, one that avoided work and drama.

Ben dropped his head not sure where to even start, "The family fell apart after...well Auntie Anya held the family together, and I miss Zoshie Uncle Guy, we used to be really close and now she won't speak to me..." Guy hadn't noticed how strong Ben's Polish accent was until he buried his head in his hands and whispered something in his second tongue. Guy could just about make out 'this is a mess' and some other words. He knew it was a way to hide his feelings because Anya did the same, sometimes he'd hear her pray in Polish, Ben used to have quite a posh English accent but being around his Polish family obviously he had picked it up.

"Then keep at it, I didn't get where I was with her by giving up at the first disaster, I kept on trying and now she comes to me for advice," Guy moved his arms off the table so the coffee could be put on it, "Thank you. Zosia won't forget but she will forgive and you need to keep at it, don't push it but keep at it," Guy checked which coffee was stronger and then took a sip of his, "How is your dad? Now I mean," Guy had known from day one how close Anya and her twin brother were, it was almost some kind of twin power that they had and he had no way of breaking it. Guy himself had gotten to know Arek quite well and knew from the funeral that he wouldn't cope without her.

"Well enough for me to leave but…still quite numb," Ben strayed away from the question and kept on drinking his coffee, Guy wasn't stupid he knew it was a touchy subject so he pushed no further and waited for Ben to speak, "He…got himself into drugs, not just like weed or LSD or anything like that, I mean hard core drugs; cocaine, he even got himself into this drug called Krokodil but he's been clean for a year and I have to trust that he'll be fine with just Babcia and Dziadek. It was scary to see," Guy had no idea what to say, what do you say to that? Ben said nothing after that, he went rather quiet.

Meanwhile on Darwin, Ollie had walked into the staff room where he found Zosia, she was sat on the sofa scrolling through her phone, looking at photos of her and her cousins, some were from when they very little and others were from just before Anya died, "I'm guessing he's not an ex-boyfriend?" Ollie joked but Zosia said nothing, "Zosia please…I don't want it to be like this, I want us to sort things out."

"Ollie leave me alone please…I've got more important things to think about, my estranged cousin is here working and I'm still having to think about moving back into the flat. So excuse me if I'm not exactly in the mood for discussing our non-existent relationship!" Zosia went to go to the staffroom door but Ollie had other ideas,

"Zosia," Ollie dashed over to the door and closed it, he grabbed her arm and looked her deep in the eyes, "Please...I'm sorry. I know I messed up," he studied her face, her eyes moved left to right and then she laughed.

"You should've thought about that before snogged Cara's face off," Zosia rather quickly pulled her arm out of Ollie's grip, though as she did that it clicked and then pain went travelling up it, her face showed pain, though she tried to hide it. In between family blasts from the past, the pain in her arm and still grieving she felt her eyes water up and then arms around her, not even caring it was Ollie she let her guard down.

"Come on let's go sit down," he guided his ex to the sofa when they got on there, Zosia laid her head on his shoulder and sobbed.

Thirty minutes later

As Ben re-entered Darwin, Zosia stated at him, she half wanted to forgive him just like that but there was no way he was going to be let off the hook that easy. Zosia turned away and walked towards a patient. Ben felt Guy put his hand on his shoulder and squeeze it, it was a squeeze of courage.

It was within that minute Zosia had to press the emergency buzzer to call for a crash team. As Zosia did chest compressions, her cousin ran over to help, she didn't argue as the pain in her arm was getting worse and she looked down to find it swollen, Ben noticed her face, "Switch?" he asked and Zosia nodded, as she went round to the patients head and she squeezed the bag and mask.

"Charging...clear," Jac Naylor waited until all was clear until she defibrillated him, "Charge to 100," Jac ordered. As the patient was revived after five minutes Jac called Zosia out, "Dr March...I noticed your arm is swollen, must I send you to get it sorted?"

"It's fine I just pulled it," Zosia tried to cross her arms but it hurt, "It's nothing serious," Zosia didn't fool Jac, but Jac wasn't one to pry so with a simple nod Jac stayed out of it.

"By the way, if I ever see you and your cousin argue you'll both be off this ward by the time I say leave," Jac warned, she walked away her long ginger hair blowing behind her, Zosia sighed heavily as she felt rather embarrassed, then she spotted her cousin.

"Ben..." Zosia called her cousin who was about to go into the staff room, "Thank you, for taking over..." Zosia rubbed her sore arm and smiled, "What?" her smile dropped when he had his eye on her arm.

"Want me to take a look at that?" he offered, Zosia contemplated leaving it, but she knew that would make it ten times worse. So with a big sigh of defeat Zosia opened up the staff room door and they both walked in, "Sit down," he ordered and Zosia walked over, sat down on the free seat and unfolded her arm for Ben to look, "How did you do it?" he asked after inspecting it, he didn't see any obvious signs of a broken bone, he was able to move it and manipulate it, only it hurt Zosia when he did. He came to the conclusion: a strained muscle.

"Trying to get away from Ollie, I think after tugging away from you and him. I think I strained it," Zosia explain and then she relaxed her arm but as she did a shooting pain came rushing through it, "Don't give me that look..."

"Zoshie-"

"Shh!" she hit his arm with her non affected arm and glared, "Don't call me that…please you've got to help me, I can't have it affect my work," Zosia looked at him with pleading eyes, she needed to be working it was the only way she could escape the reality of Arthur.

"Zosh how?" Ben asked with complete confusion, yeah he was a miracle worker but he wasn't a healer, "You know how it works; pain in the muscle during use, swelling, various other symptoms, you need to let it heal," Ben explained and Zosia being Zosia mumbled and then said nothing, "You had to ask me to take over-"

"Because you offered! I would've coped with it," Zosia argued but when she moved her arm it tightened up and she had to hide her pain. It failed because Ben had to hide a laugh and Zosia glared, "I would've coped."

"Oh yeah! You so would've," Ben pushed himself up and ruffled her hair but Zosia used her un-injured arm to grab his arm and she dug her nails into it, "Ouch! Zosia, nails..ahh," he looked at his arm and it had three quite deep nail marks, one was close to drawing blood and the others were sore, "You've made me bleed look," he didn't receive any sympathy only a laugh.

"You shouldn't wind me up then should you? By the way your accent has gotten stronger," Zosia would notice a Polish accent a mile off, it was quite funny because she wondered if she spent enough time around him would she pick it up slightly too?

"I did live in Poland for about 3 years, you speak the language and you pick up the accent," Ben winked before he walked over to the staffroom door, "Do widzenia Zoshie," he had about five seconds to leave un-injured when he left he bumped back into Guy, "Uncle Guy."

"Please lose the uncle," he ordered, "Walk with me," Guy ushered him with his hand, "Get anywhere?" he asked curiously.

"Well...she's strained an arm muscle and is refusing to get it looked at. She noticed my accent changed and we've laughed together...that's about it. I can't help thinking there's something else bothering her, is there anything?" Ben asked and Guy sighed heavily, "Uncle Guy...is there something else?"

Guy sighed heavily and stopped in his tracks, he pulled Ben into the relatives room and looked around checking there was no one around, "Two months ago, we lost a member of our staff, he was Zosia's best friend along with Dominic Copeland's now Zosia's finding it hard to cope. You know what she does? Puts on a brave face, jokes, gets defensive when really all she wants to do is let it out. Dom. Well let's put it this way, neither of them have been back to the flat, Zosia's been living at mine now don't get me wrong, do I love having her back? Yes, but I don't want her to be afraid to step back into her own place, I hope you being here will maybe bring her out of her shell."

"Right, well, I'll keep an eye on her and see what I can do to help," Ben's pager bleeped and he quickly ran to his patient. Leaving Guy to go back to his work.

On Keller it was quiet, there had been a few routine operations: hernias, varicose veins, appendectomy, but nothing to keep Dom busy. He was sat on a chair by the nurses station when Sacha Levy came over to him, "Dr Copeland," Sacha grinned that silly childlike grin that made him look more like a child than an adult, "I've got a job for you," Sacha rubbed his hands together and Dom looked at him with no expression, "New CT1 – Ben Markiewicz, he's on Darwin but needs a tour of the hospital and I thought in my little brain that you," he pointed to him, "Would be the best person for the job," as Sacha grinned Dom's stomach turned he did not like to see people happy, especially right now.

"Well as long as he's hot I'm on it," Dom didn't even bother to look at Sacha, he just slummed away, like there was a weight on his back pushing him down.

AAU was rather quiet and Serena Campbell had managed to escape into her office, with the lights off and her laptop not even on, it was a conclusion anyone could come to – Serena was hungover, but it wasn't the first time since Arthur passed she turned up hungover, in fact it was becoming a recurring problem. Bernie Wolfe had spent these past two months watching as she drank in Albie's then got a taxi home and the next day at work turned up looking worse than she did before she left for home. Bernie bit the bullet and walked into Serena's office, it was very dark almost like a belfry, no light whatsoever.

"Hangover again?" Bernie asked, as she switched on the light making the other doctor jump. She hadn't intended to make Serena jump but she did, "Sorry. It's none of my business," Bernie watched as Serena turned her head to face her. Serena looked incredibly drained, her hair wasn't exactly clean, her eyes had dark circles around them and well she wasn't going to start on how she presented herself.

"No. Actually I was up all night thinking," Serena answered her friend, Bernie didn't believe that one bit, Serena didn't do thinking she did drowning sorrows.

"Serena," Bernie shut the door and sat on the chair next to it, "You may be able to make everyone think you are fine, but you're talking to somebody who served in the army. We're taught many ways of communicating: eye movement, body language, sign language. So look me in the eye and tell me you are fine," Bernie had her eyes on Serena and Serena glared.

"I'm fine," she replied but her eyes moved left and then upwards. Like she was thinking "am I actually ok?", "Haven't you got work to do?" Serena snapped but her head pounded and she searched her desk for some water, "Where is the bloody thing?" Serena asked herself as she opened three draws and searched through them, Bernie dangled the water bottle in her face and Serena took it, "Thank you, Bernie I'm sorry I shouldn't have snapped at you."

"It's my break so in theory if you wanted to talk, we could go down to Pulses? Have a coffee?" Bernie offered, it was tempting Serena thought to herself but somewhere in her mind it was telling her no, "Come on it'll wake you up a bit," Bernie tilted her head and smiled, Serena however had to battle with her head as her heart said yes but her brain said no, "And you'll get to see some light."

"Fine…as long as we don't do the whole bereavement thing where you talk about your feelings?" Serena stood up slowly and prepared for her trip to Pulses, Bernie however was concerned for her friend. Was this just grief or was it something deeper than Arthur's passing?


	2. Chapter Two

Serena and Bernie arrived in Pulses, "You go find us a table and I'll order the drinks," Bernie watched as Serena found them a table, mainly she wanted to make sure that Serena didn't choose it as an excuse to escape. Serena sat down and looked around the café, it was very quiet only a few people were in there.

"Here," Bernie placed the two coffees on the table, "I got you a large one," Serena said nothing but she looked down at her phone, "Earth to Serena?"

"Sorry…thank you," Serena put her phone away and then put her attention onto Bernie, "Eleanor just messaged me, she's not coming home this weekend, ever get times where you just feel like you're no longer important in your kid's life?" Serena raised an eyebrow and Bernie fell quiet she allowed her head to fall downwards, "Oh I'm sorry here's me talking about missing a weekend when you've not seen yours. Have you gotten anywhere with them?"

"Oh they're just still not sure how they feel about having a bisexual mother, nor are they sure they want to speak to me again," Bernie took a sip of her coffee and then said nothing after that, an awkward silence fell upon them, "How was the thinking last night?" Bernie asked trying to break their silence though it was probably the wrong thing to say at the time.

"I thought we weren't going to talk about grieving?" Serena raised her eyebrow again and Bernie couldn't help but laugh, it said one thing about them they weren't brilliant at making conversation.

Dominic however had just arrived on Darwin to pick up his new "friend", he hoped he'd avoid Zosia since they hadn't spoken to each other a lot recently, Zosia had been staying with her dad and neither had gone to the flat so they were at the moment like ships through the night, "Excuse me I'm looking for someone named Dr…urmm…Dr foreign sounding surname?" he could not remember it for the life of him and then when the man he was speaking to started laughing, he assumed he found his man.

"I'm guessing you mean me?" Ben put down a clipboard and folded his arms, "I'm Dr Markiewicz if that's who you want?" Ben waited for a response.

"Yes…I'm apparently your buddy for the day, now shall we start?" Dom wanted to get off the ward as soon as possible because the chances of bumping into Zosia was very close.

"I don't know this place…so you chose," Ben walked over to the lift and pressed the button, "Hey Zosia! You've been here a long time where do I start?" he saw Dom and Zosia exchange looks but say nothing then it clicked to him, "I'm guessing you're Dr Copeland?"

"And going by the surname you two are related? Did you set this up?" Dom looked at Zosia, Zosia didn't have time to even reply when Dom started to go off on one, "Did you tell about Arthur? How dare you! He was our friend and you can't just go and tell anyone about it-"

"Dom I didn't know until an hour ago that Ben was even in the country!" Zosia snapped back and Ben regretted his decision to even bring up about Dom, "How would I even-"

"You know what Zosia? For the last few months you couldn't care about Arthur, you were at Oli's every night and you only came home when he snogged a nurse, you knew every single detail and you didn't care! You talk about your dad being selfish…you don't even have the guts to talk to me by yourself, you need to have your whatever he is do the work for you," Dom didn't even take the lift when the doors open he stormed away though before he got to the exit he walked back to Zosia, "You're just as selfish as your father, but the difference is he had the guts to stay with your mother whilst she died, you're now suddenly pretending you care," Dom walked away leaving Zosia to take in what Dom had just said. Zosia walked away herself and tried to think of somewhere to think, nowhere was private other than the roof so she made her way up the staircases and onto the flat roof where the weather was wet, cold and dreary. Dom stormed back onto Keller where Sacha thought he'd have the new CT1 beside him.

"Dom where's?" Sacha looked around thinking he had missed him, "The new CT1?"

"On Darwin, he's Zosia's cousin I mean come on you'd think Zosia would have the guts to talk to me, and not ask you and her cousin to do the dirty work for her," Dom plonked himself on the chair and he noticed Sacha's face, "What?"

"Dom, it was Hanssen's idea you and Dr Markiewicz toured the hospital, because Hanssen knows you know how it feels to come back a year behind, Ben's been away from work because of looking after his father, Zosia's uncle…it wasn't a set up," Sacha watched as Dom's puppy eyes became guilty looking and then Dom stood up and raced to find Zosia.

Zosia stood by the railings and looked down below, she felt the rain dampening her hair and wet her skin, her phone was vibrating in her pocket but she ignored it, "What would you do mama?" Zosia asked to the sky, "I don't know what to do..."

Dom ran onto Darwin and pulled Ben aside, "Where's Zosia? I can't get hold of her," Dom saw by the look on Ben's face that he was not happy with him, "Please I know I messed up-"

"I don't like you Doctor Copeland, keep away from Zosia," Ben walked away from Dom and went to search for Zosia, he had an idea of where she could be. Zosia usually went to the roof when she wanted to do in-depth thinking. Dom however kept on trying her phone, each time he rang she declined the call.

"Zosia please answer, I'm sorry I messed up...I didn't mean any of what I said please," Dom dropped his phone on the Darwin nurses station, "Oliver have you seen Zosia?" he ran over to Ollie and hoped that Zosia had spoken to him.

"No we haven't spoke since this morning, why?" Ollie asked concerned, "Dom?"

"I messed up..."

Pulses had turned into Serena and Bernie planning a night out, though Bernie was using it as an excuse to keep an eye on Serena's alcohol intake for the night, "Right so Albie's after shift?" Bernie realised her break was over and that she needed to get back to duty.

"I'll bring the Shiraz," Serena threw her paper cup in the bin and then the two women made their way back to AAU, "Listen Bernie...thank you, you've been the first person to speak to me like I'm an actual human being."

Zosia was counting the raindrops as they fell onto the silver railing, "Zosia?" she jumped when she heard her cousin's voice, "You've been rejecting my calls as well?"

"I'm just wanting time alone," Zosia didn't even turn around, she just watched the rain fall, "Though Dom has a point, I avoided Arthur because I was scared. Scared of what the cancer did to him, scared of watching him die and I just avoided them. I did exactly what my dad does, buried myslef in my work and I feel guilty as hell."

Ben wrapped his arms around Zosia holding her tight Zosia hugged him back her arms around him, "You did what you thought was best at the time and whatever anyone says you were there when he died, that's all that matters."

"I could've done so much more though," Zosia whispered, "I could've helped make his last months the best he had...why didn't I do that?!"

"Because nobody knows what to do until that person is dead, dad said the same thing as you. You need to move on Zoshie, don't think about the what ifs and the buts. You are still here and standing," Ben had pulled away then put his hands on her shoulders, "I'm freezing and you are too, can we go inside now?" he asked. Zosia agreed, they made their way down the stairs it fell silent between them, "Zosia," Ben stopped on the stair he was on and Zosia stopped walking then paused as well turning around to face him, "I really am sorry, I should've kept in contact."

"Yeah well going back on what you said, I can imagine that's what happened they were close and you needed to look after your dad. I'm not angry," Zosia smiled and Ben did so too, it seemed ice had been thawed between them, "There's something going on in Albie's tonight, want to come with me? You can get to know everyone and maybe start over with Dom? He's not bad Ben, he's just...struggling," Zosia studied Ben's face hoping for a sign he'd think about it.

"Haven't we got work to be doing?" Ben ran in front of Zosia and Zosia ran behind him, "And Dom can finish you the tour...as long as you can forgive him for earlier."

* * *

Dom was on Darwin sat in the staffroom with a cup of tea, he had just had a few words from Jac about causing scenes on the ward, and how he's lucky it's Sacha looking out for him. Ben half contemplated walking away but he felt Zosia poke him in the back, he cleared his throat making Dom jump, "Zosia!" Dom jumped up and ran over to her, he took her about two feet back by hugging her, "I'm sorry...I was horrible and I didn't mean it," he looked at her with his puppy eyes all watery, "I'm sorry."

"Dom it's fine, I forgive you," Zosia hugged him back and she squeezed him tight, "Also someone wants to say sorry to you, don't you Ben?" Zosia turned around and placed hand on her hip and smiled, "Don't you Ben? It's a small word."

"Dom...sorry, I may have overreacted and-"

"It's fine. I may have also overreacted, it's a sensitive topic."

* * *

 _"Try, try, try to separate them_  
 _It's an illusion_  
 _Try, try, try, and you will only come_  
 _To this conclusion"  
_

Played in Albie's as Serena entered with Bernie, Serena saw after work drinks were going on and she joined; Ric, Raf, Fletch, Zosia, Ollie, Ben, Dom, Guy and Sacha, "So did you get around to seeing the hospital together then?" Sacha asked Dom who looked over at Ben and they both nodded. Proudly Sacha smiled before sitting back in the chair.

"So you're Zosia's cousin then?" Fletch asked as he took a sip of beer, a very helpful neighbour of Fletch and Raff had offered to babysit, so they could enjoy after work drinks, "Holby Grapevine is pretty good,"

"Yeah we're related," he put his arm around her and then pushed himself up, "I mean not that you can notice...I am clearly the better looking one," Ben winked and Zosia playfully hit him on the arm.

"Alright so a glass of Shiraz for you," Bernie placed the glass in front of Serena and Serena gulped it down.

"You know what we do back home when there's like a big get together thing?" Ben clapped his hands on his knees then grinned, however to his right Guy groaned and Zosia hid her face, "Karaoke! Anyone?"

"Oh no way! I do not do karaoke," Serena's sober mind spoke however it wouldn't take her long, once tipsy to get behind that micrphone.

"No sorry, I don't do karaoke either," Guy said as he stood up to reach over the table for his whiskey, "You should know that by now."

"So you weren't singing ABBA in the summer of 2010 then?" Ben laughed internally it was a funny memory, Guy was sober but had been persuaded by his wife and daughter to take the stand. So on Guy went to sing ABBA he had quite a good voice, quite deep and relaxing, "Yeah I remember," Ben looked at Zosia in the face then they both laughed, Zosia spilt her vodka and coke slightly.

"Well I think it would be rather fun don't you Raffy darling?" Fletch of course was only kidding when he spoke to Raf like he was his husband and ruffled his hair, Serena and Bernie had gotten used to the bromance between Fletch and Raff, it had become so normal that they both worried when the two weren't speaking to each other. Whilst Bernie called it trouble in paradise, Serena called it a small domestic.

"Oh yes fantastic, who doesn't want to be up there embarassing themselves?" Raf hated karaoke, he had to be very drunk to even be put on the stage it was rare when he was sober that he sang.

"Aww but you've working so hard on your The Proclaimers stuff," Fletch joked and the whole table started laughing, "Come on I hear you in the shower, "I would walk five hundred miles and I would walk five hundred more-"

"He is lying," Raff put his hand against Fletch's mouth to stop him singing and embarassing him even further, "I do not sing The Proclaimers!"

"Oh sorry my bad...he likes a bit of Braveheart don't you? His alarm is 'FREEDOM'," Fletch couldn't help but laugh at Raf's less than impressed face, as he gathered himself again Fletch then turned to his housemate, "Sorry."

"My alarm does not go FREEDOM! It's The Red Hot Chilli Pipers."

* * *

"Thank you, thank you..." Ben stumbled up on the stage after Ollie had just sang, he grabbed hold of the microphone and laughed, "Ok...next up," he drunkingly laughed as he went through the name requests, "Is...Serena Campbell and Bernie Wolfe," Serena snapped her head around very quickly, "Serena? Bernie?" the spotlight fell onto Serena and Bernie.

"No I...I don't sing well," Serena lied, she did have a really good voice but never really used it.

"I...urm.."

Raf and Fletch jumped into action, Raf grabbed them both under their arms and Fletch held onto their free hands, "Ladies and Gentleman, the amazing Serena and Bernie!" Fletch announced and both men quickly jumped off the stage.

"You will be singing Mamma Mia by ABBA," Ben announced he slowly guided himself off the stage, then held onto Zosia for support, "It works...a little bit of karaoke brings everyone together."

"I don't think Dom would agree," Zosia looked over at her friend who looked rather pensive, she left her cousin and walked over to him, "Dom?" Zosia announced her presence, Dom shuffled over so Zosia could sit next to him, "I'm sorry, there's sometimes no stopping him," Zosia remembered how Arthur had told her they sang karaoke together. Zosia didn't need to say anything she just allowed Dom rest his head on her shoulder, "I miss him too," Zosia rubbed her hand up and down his arm and Dom tried to fight tears, "I love you," she whispered.

"I miss you Zosh," he said sadly then he pulled away from Zosia's hug, "I'm scared to go back in there though, he's just there...he's not but he is. Zosh how do I go back in there?" he asked with a voice of defeat, "I can't."

Zosia pulled him into a tight hug and Dom cried, "We'll go in there together," Zosia whispered as her friend cried on her, Dom held onto Zosia tight, like he was scared of losing her, like she was going to slip through his fingers, "I promsie you ok, we'll go back there together."

 _"Mamma mia, here I go again_  
 _My my, how can I resist you?_  
 _Mamma mia, does it show again?_  
 _My my, just how much I've missed you"_

Serena and Bernie both sang together their heads together, Serena pulled her head away and then blurted out:

 _"Yes, I've been brokenhearted_  
 _Blue since the day we parted,"_ her voice was so powerful that it shocked the whole pub,

 _"Why, why did I ever let you go?"_ Bernie contributed to the chorus and Serena laughed

 _"Mamma mia, now I really know,_  
 _My my, I could never let you go,"_

They both sang together the music built up and they eventually broke out together,

 _"Yes, I've been brokenhearted_  
 _Blue since the day we parted_  
 _Why, why did I ever let you go_  
 _Mamma mia, now I really know_  
 _My my, I could never let you go_ " as the song ended they both drew long breaths and took a bow, "Go Ms Campbell!" Raff stood up and whistled with both fingers on each side in his mouth.

"That's quite a voice you've got there," Bernie said to her friend who just carried on walking, "Shall I get us another drink?"

"After that? I need about twenty," Serena made her way next to Dom who was still clapping along with the others.

"That's quite a voice Serena," Zosia found it extremely weird calling Serena, Serena it was like school teachers what do you call them after you leave school?

Ben got back up on stage with the guitar he had brought with him into England, "Ok...so after everyone pretty much has their turn, I like to slow it down a bit. Now I'm not sure what religions you guys are, or even if you believe in anything but..." Ben had to swallow a growing lump in his throat, "This used to be sung to me when I was very little," he moved his guitar capo up a bit and then started playing a tun _e, "_ You don't need to stay if you don't want to but yeah here it goes."

 _"Lord, the light of your love is shining_  
 _In the midst of the darkness, shining_  
 _Jesus, Light of the world, shine upon us_  
 _Set us free by the truth you now bring us_  
 _Shine on me, shine on me,"_ Ben played the chords for a few seconds before singing the chorus,

"I'll be back," Bernie pushed herself off the chair and stepped outside the fresh air cooling her rather hot face, Serena sensed there was something wrong and walked out to find her.

"Are you ok?" Serena walked outside arms crossed and her wind blowing in the air, "Bernie?"

"So many wars Serena, so many fights, people dying, all in the name of God," Bernie looked up to the dark sky and sighed heavily, "I'm not criticsing Ben or his family because they can believe whatever and so can all the hospital but...I've seen way too many people be killed in the name of God and that this is what he would want."

"Don't think I'm comparing because I'm not, but Arthur's death was...well it wasn't nice, he was so much younger than me, younger than that useless ex of mine and yet he's dead. My mother she wasn't exactly young but she still had her golden years and she's gone. There's no justice whether you believe or not, you still die. You've seen death on the battlefield, I've seen death on hospital beds on theatre tables, but it all comes down to where they'll go after death. We're not here forever, and if people feel the need to turn to something higher up then so be it," Serena saw Bernie turn around to face her and she smiled, "There was me earlier saying about no grief talk."

"We're a pair of old fools."

"Who are you calling old?" Serena pushed herself off the railing and walked back in, Bernie followed the song was just ending.

* * *

Dom walked into Guy's house with Zosia and Ben, Guy following behind, once they were all in thier pyjamas Zosia, Dom and Ben laid in the big double in the spare room, "Love you Zosia," Dom said sleepily, "Thank you for being a good friend."

"You're welcome Dom," she said as he then fell asleep on her snoring, "Want one?" she handed Ben a grape and he took it, "So where are you staying?" she asked curiously.

"Megan's offered to have me, Zyta's offered but I don't know...I'll decide tomorrow I have a whole day. There's always Premier Inn's" he took another grape and then pulled out his book.

"I've promised Dom we'll go back to the flat tomorrow so...if you want, you can bunk with me?" Zosia whispered, "My beds a double and since we're able to fit in this one all three of us it's pretty amazing."

"That's because you're so slim Zoshie," Ben said half jokingly and half concerned, "Have you been eating? Not just grapes?" he asked.

"Goodnight," Zosia avoided the subject and curled over to go to sleep, "I don't mind the light being on."

Now Ben had concerns, she was too skinny even for her height and BMI, with that he got out of bed to go into the living room, "Uncle Guy can I talk to you?" Ben asked his uncle who was sat on the sofa, "It's about Zosia..." Guy looked up at Ben confused and concerned.

 **AN: Sorry I've taken so long to update! Here it is :) let me know if you like it! I made it fairly long in case I have a few more assignments out for college ;) from**

 **Cassidy xxxx**


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